How to write

I promise that my hand isn't really that pink. Or foreshortened.

Anyway.

It's newsletter time at work again (or, rather, it was newsletter time three weeks ago but no one ever gets stuff in on time) and long-time viewers will know that newsletter time always sends me into a right snit.

I hate editing the newsletter.

Part of it's the on-time problem (I wonder -- do dentists ever get tired of pulling teeth? I sure do), but the bigger part is the blah, so-so, and sometimes truly awful writing that I have to figure out what to do with.

It drives me mad, really. This is an interpretive centre, and we're in the business of not only communicating, but communicating well. We have an educated staff, too, including more than one teacher. Why do they have so much trouble expressing themselves?

This may surprise any of my two fans that only know me from the blog, but I can write. From the feedback I get, I can honestly tell you that I write well. At this point in my career I can say that I write well at many levels, too. Here on the blog it's very informal and stylised (um, for those who didn't realise it, I do actually put thought into the way I express myself while blathering). For the newsletter and work blog it's somewhat more formal but still fairly conversational. For displays, it's concise and clear. Back when I was writing scientific papers in university, it was extremely specific. For the weekly memo to the weekend staff... erm. Well, those get a bit goofy. I have a hard time writing a business-style memo when we're pretty loose around here.

What I'm saying is that for each of these applications there's a way to write that works well. Choice of words is important. Syntax is important. Clarity is important. Why don't these educated people know that?

You can't tell at all that I get frustrated, can you?

I recently got a submission from a staffer who doesn't usually write for the newsletter but decided that she'd submit something this time. Good. I always need content. She even had it edited by an English teacher friend, apparently. Good again. It would be nice to be able to just slot something in without editing it.

Sigh. Shouldn't get my hopes up. Apparently English teacher friend never learned that simpler is better. I'm going to be changing a lot of utilise to use and peruse to look, unfortunately. That kind of writing doesn't make you seem more intelligent; it just makes it look like you're reaching.

My mother was, for a large part of her career, the office manager for a medical clinic. She used to type out a fair amount of dictation. One of her big pet peeves was the phrase was seen by myself rather than just was seen by me. Myself is basically the doctor version of utilise in the article I will, unfortunately, be editing.

Aaand I guess I'd better get to it. Expect a fair load of grumpiness in the next work week, folks. And if you really want to piss me off, make sure you send me an e-mail with at least one utilise in it.



Address it to myself.