Oh no, wait. I'm always cranky.
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I was reading one of those what to put in your make-up bag things this morning. Why, I'm not sure. I've never been a particularly girly girl (my barbies were always in various states of plastic fracture because they did stunts rather than hanging around the pool). Not a tomboy in the slightest, mind you; I just don't understand the ultrafeminine attitude. It doesn't make sense to me. It's also not practical at all. Still, I read those Cosmoesque internet articles. Maybe to try to get it, or more likely to annoy myself. Today? Three things you ABSOLUTELY MUST HAVE in your kit if you couldn't have anything else.
Their verdict? A BB-style foundation (they gave a brand name for each thing on the list. I'm not going to bother repeating them), a red lipstick, and a mascara.
Seriously? Whatever, ladies.
Ok, a couple of caveats before I go on with my opinion. First, I've been known to go out without make-up. I know, right? Shock, horror, and how the hell could anyone stand to look at me? Second, I have a decidedly non-girly job. If I came to the nature centre in fashion plate make-up everyone would wonder what paint store I'd been hit by. Oh, and third since I'm apparently counting "a couple" in Monty Python style, if you're an aficionado of the smokey eye I promise you that I'll be looking at you wondering why you're imitating a raccoon.
Understood? Then let's begin.
First the BB creme (HATE the whole cute BB name trend, but whatever). Yeah, I'm ok with that. In fact, on work days I use a BB creme, although certainly not the high-end one the article recommends. Who wants to spend that much on a foundation when you could buy, say, food?
Next, the lipstick. A lip colour is important if you're a make-up person and you're carrying a small bag, I suppose, but bright red is decidedly not appropriate for every situation. Sometimes it just makes you look tarty. I'll give them the lipstick, but only if it's something a lot subtler.
And now, the mascara. No. Mascara is not a necessity. It's a pain in the arse is what it is. And yes, I've worn mascara. I used to wear it frequently as a teenager, and it was usually neon blue. Gotta love the eighties. Anyway, I gave up mascara when I went to university, and I've maybe used it twice since. Regretted it every time. When I used to wear contacts it just irritated my eyes, and once I switched to only glasses I constantly felt my artificially-hardened lashes brushing the lenses.
Yeah, I have fairly long lashes. And fairly dark ones, so I don't suppose I have a need of mascara in everyday life. Gee, do you suppose that might have biased me in some way?...
Mascara's still a pain, though. And so many mascara-using people wear it so badly. Too heavy, too clumpy, too stupid-looking. It's the girl's version of clown college, as far as I'm concerned.
So what would I suggest instead? Oh yes, I have a suggestion. Eyeliner, but not black. Black is too harsh. The one I use most often is sort of purple-ish (the theory being, according to the experts, that it might bring out some of the green in my blue-green eyes), and here at Dad's I use a double-ended thing that has a brown liner on one end and a highlighter on the other end. That's when I wear make-up here, of course. I don't always, because it's the weekend and I'm not really going anywhere. If I do, it's just the liner and a bit of powder to knock the shine off.
Get a feeling that the cosmetics industry's advertising juggernaut never quite ran over me?
Anyway, lunch time for me now. And maybe a little less girly reading. Otherwise, the next post will turn out to be something like What is it with you people and stupid shoes?
I never have got the shoe thing either. Do you suppose that maybe I'm not a girl?
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